I've actually had this dress since December 2009 and have been chickening out from wearing this outside the premises of my room since then.
I've always been a shirt-and-jeans girl ever since we moved from the city to the countryside. I guess I was afraid of getting ridiculed by the way I dressed since everyone from the countryside never really dress up. When we moved, I learned the word 'igat', a Hiligaynon term for slut. I was and still am a goody two shoes and being called that just doesn't cut for me.
Another thing that affected the way I dressed was adolescence. I have always been tormented with those crap called INSECURITIES that never fails to hunt me all the time back then. Insecurities still hunts me up until now. I have ugly legs. I have tons of pimples. I have zero sex appeal. Not to mention that the only 'guys' that takes interest in me are elementary students. Let me dream on and consider elementary kids as 'guys' who takes interest in me romantically okay?
I'm often called weird by my senpais and classmates. Gets called bookworm and nerd a lot. Guys I know also never fails to call me 'ugly' everyday. I'm not that smart. I'm not even a good writer and yet I aspire to be a journalist after Uni (or during).
If I continued writing about my insecurities I'd probably tire you out and think of my blog and writing skills as crap if you haven't already.
Back to the main point. I don't know what happened that changed me. Up until I was a sophomore, I wore shirt and jeans. I even planned to go to school in my pajamas but never got to do it. Whatever made me change made me realize that sure, insecurities are often at your tail. Biting. But you know, it's always up to you how much you let insecurity bite you.
Hi, thanks for your comment on my blog! I was so sad to hear about your battle with insecurities. You're so young! You shouldn't worry about these kinds of things yet. And yet I've definitely been in your shoes; between the ages of 13 and 15 is probably when I was at my most insecure. But I promise you that it'll change completely! Adolescence is difficult for everyone. I didn't kiss a boy until I was nearly a senior in high school, and strangely enough, I think that was the perfect time. You are surely not alone in your issues about insecurity. But I'm happy to hear that you're finding ways to get around it, and to conquer it, in a way, like wearing that pretty dress! Just be confident, and brave, and everyone will love you just as you are. :)
ReplyDeleteKeep up the posts! :)
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